Comments for modernsex

Comment on Second Chance by mrschadt

mrschadt — Wed, 25 Feb 2009 12:19:41 +0000

Silly how our memories can hold the most cherished things and forget the simple things like a name.

Comment on intermission by Anonymous

Anonymous — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 02:57:45 +0000

More, more!

Comment on Something Unpredictable by shelley

shelley — Thu, 05 Feb 2009 22:16:32 +0000

I’m totally a heart-breaker.
In high school, i pretty much just dated for fun and socializing, not really because i wanted to get romantically involved. Most of my boyfriends started out as guy friends I just hung out with a lot. Sure, the kissing and flirting was fun, but I’m not one to be overcome by passion.

9th grade I dated 3 different guys… each one lasted about a month before I realized… “Crap, he’s REALLY into me, and i like him and all, but nothing serious.” But I’d feel guilty doing the dumping, so I’d just kind of avoid the guy until he’d break up with me. Terrible, I know. It also means I’m not friends with any of my exes.

10th & 11th grade I avoided that problem by just not dating. I loved the freedom of being single, because flirting and keeping it casual is more my style. It’s terrible to say, but I really enjoyed the freedom I had in China. Luckily I’m with someone who knows I need my space/freedom/guy friends, whatever, otherwise it never would have lasted this long.

Comment on The Fall by Anonymous

Anonymous — Wed, 04 Feb 2009 18:38:01 +0000

My first time was actually really similar to this; I should have seen it coming a mile off. We played around sometimes, usually because I was just tired of fighting about it and wanted to get him to shut up. So yeah, he’d use just the tip, but there was a condom in place because I’m uber paranoid about pregnancy and am not completely oblivious to the things they teach in sex ed. Still, the entire time I’d flinch and pull back at just about anything, just to be sure. But even while playing around and such, I was constantly reminding him - more like begging - “Don’t go in,” and pulling away or pushing him back at even a hint of penetration. I never instigated, it was always me just getting worn down about the issue, and like you, getting passive. It usually shut him up for a while, but the issue always came up again far sooner than I would have liked. Then it was his birthday… at this point I thought I could trust him to not go far. The boundaries had been CLEARLY laid out.

Sadly for me, he was on top, so I actually saw his face when it happened. Even during a stream of constant “no’s” in response to his pleas, and the reminders/pleads that he not penetrate, he was able to lose himself in the moment, or didn’t care, at this point it doesn’t really matter which. Then this look of smug self-satisfaction came over his face, and he proudly told me “I’m in.” WTF? I started crying then and there… and… surprise surprise… he didn’t really understand why I was upset! To this day, his expression at that very moment of penetration haunts me. The “you told me not to but I did it anyway, and am VERY proud of myself for doing it, and you can’t go back and change a damn thing” look. Like Jay, I don’t know if he realizes that it was rape.

I imagine there are FAR too many women (and to a lesser extent men) who have been pressured into it and taken against their will when the other person just REFUSED to let up. At a certain point, the only way to get around such an issue is dump the guy/girl who is putting all the pressure on, but if everything else in the relationship is working, a break-up based on sex is harder to justify.

I heard someone say this in a movie, or maybe it’s a quote from a book, but I think it’s a good rule to follow, and one that everyone should be taught:

“If you find that you are dressing yourself AND the other person… you are going WAY too fast.”

If the undressing isn’t mutual, then chances are, they’re not nearly as into it as you are.

Comment on Something Unpredictable by Lisa

Lisa — Mon, 02 Feb 2009 17:05:25 +0000

I believe I have already mentioned this before, and many already know… but I’m kind of a bad person. I cheated on my first boyfriend, Danny, who I was with for 4 years. For one thing, I really didn’t know how to properly be in a relationship at that point since no one had even expressed interest in my before Danny. I dated him for all the wrong reasons. Granted, I did grow to love him, but it wasn’t what I wanted… it wasn’t what I needed at the time. To be honest, I didn’t know what I needed at the time. I didn’t know who I was yet, and as you mentioned, I was not happy with myself either.

It first started with a friend of mine… we would flirt pretty heavily and, long story short, became makeout buddies. It never went any further than that though, and I never had any desire to get closer to him in any way. Danny never knew about that… and still probably doesn’t.

When I came down to Orlando on spring break with my friend Patryk, I officially cheated I guess. I had never actually slept with anyone else while I was with Danny… except for now. I, being the romantic Disney princess that I am, got swept up in the idea of romance and let it get the best of me. Danny found out somehow (still unsure how) and was devastated. As I’ve mentioned before, he had always been outrageously jealous and afraid of all this happening in the first place, so it hit him pretty hard to be right.

I felt terrible and still do sometimes. Despite my own justifications and reasons, I still know it was wrong. There was a lot that was wrong. He has only recently “forgiven” me and started talking to me again. I haven’t actually spoken to him since, only email and text. I don’t know if I could bring myself to actually face him or hear his voice again… I’d feel too bad.

Comment on Something Unpredictable by Natasha

Natasha — Mon, 02 Feb 2009 04:31:58 +0000

weasel = Brian Webb

Comment on The More, the Merrier. Maybe. by Aemok

Aemok — Sun, 01 Feb 2009 05:29:11 +0000

I love the idea of threesomes, I love being in threesomes. My only issue thus far has been having a threesome who was to close a friend to us both (a plus) but had an extremely different set of boundaries and could be extremely manipulativ (the negative).

Comment on Parental Units by natasha

natasha — Tue, 27 Jan 2009 19:32:05 +0000

It was actually you who had the hicky, hence your parent’s concern. You said it was someone from your bus stop, and I’m pretty sure you even gave them a name, but I can’t for the life of me remember who.

Comment on Parental Units by not4ureyes2c

not4ureyes2c — Mon, 26 Jan 2009 03:32:30 +0000

I’m glad things went well with your parents. They sound like good people.
Funny thing is my mom was dating one of my dad’s friends before they got together too.

Comment on Shebop by Lisa

Lisa — Mon, 19 Jan 2009 14:15:57 +0000

So… I’m not a toy kind of person… lol. For whatever reason it STILL to this day makes me uncomfortable. I only masturbate clitorally.

There was one time when I tried/considered the idea of pentration during masturbation. My boyfriend at the time worked at RadioShack, and they had just gotten in this massaging bath pillow. The battery pack inside the pillow was this long smooth shaft, and that was the part that actually vibrated and caused the massaging sensation of the pillow. He bought one for me to basically use as a vibrator. I was kind of… offended at first. I didn’t want it. I had him lol. But, eventually, I decided to try it.

It didn’t do anything for me. I don’t know if it was just me being so uncomfortable with it already, or if it just didn’t work the way I was trying to make it work. Either way, I didn’t see what the big deal was.

Maybe my vagina’s just weird lol.